Successfulness

So my wife and I have been on a weight loss journey as of late. We've actually been quite successful in the short term. I believe in the past month and a half we've both lost well over a dozen pounds, each. And that's body fat lost, not lean tissue. How do I know? You got me. I don't know for sure. But we're doing it with a combination of exercise, increasing our daily movement, and sensible nutrition with the help of a registered dietitian.

What I want to share with you today is just a little bit of what's helped us. I am not saying it will work for you, or that you'll find it easy to work with, either. But these aren't hard and fast rules; they're merely the guidelines that we decided upon and have found to be tremendously helpful. And the best part is we actually started doing them before we met with the dietitian, so we find them to be easier to abide by since we don't feel that they were imposed upon us from the RD. (Just so you don't get the wrong idea, our RD did not give us any hard and fast rules to follow, either. There were some gentle suggestions and minor tweaks to what we were doing, but that was it. I wouldn't go to an RD or any medical professional who said it was "my way or the highway". But that's a different post, I suppose.)

Anyway, here are the weekly (not daily) guidelines that we have followed. I realize it's not for everyone. But maybe you can take a few of these to create your own guidelines. Or maybe they'll inspire you to create your own.

Without further ado, here they are (in no particular order):

• 3 days of exercise (my exercise of choice is swimming)
• 1 (or more) extra workouts from home (preferably a cardio workout; elliptical trainer, treadmill, walk, or bike ride are good choices for me)
• No more than (NMT) 4 dessert SERVINGS
• NMT 4 sodas (we've been REALLY successful at this one. Most weeks I only have 1 now)
• NMT 3 coffee with creamer (black is fine for all days. But I was getting out of control with putting creamer in my coffee. If I miss on any of these guidelines, this is usually the culprit)
• 6 or more glasses of water a day
• make a meal plan for the week
  
• journal foods, workouts and/or emotions to capture any unhealthy patterns or find any triggers for overeating

And sometimes we just miss on a guideline. That's fine. That's when this little guy comes in handy:

Next meal or snack, on track.

Not every day is going to go as planned. Don't worry about it. There will be pitfalls, there will be setbacks, there will be family gatherings that will be hard to avoid certain foods. Allow yourself to have them and get right back on your path.

Believe me. It can be done!

Ciao.

Undesirable

That's right. I am an undesirable. I kind of had it in the back of my mind before, but now I know for sure.and I don't mean in that romantic, sexual "I gotta have you!" way. (Heh, that went out the door years ago.) No, I mean in the way that I am a social outcast,a pariah of sorts because I am an obese person in this country.

I had two instances last week that proved it to me. The funny thing is, it's something that's been happening for quite a while but I never really noticed or paid much attention to it until recently.

The first incident happened with a podiatrist, of all people. Now, I understand that a podiatrist is a medical professional and is somewhat concerned with my overall health and well-being. That said, though, I went to him for problems related to my feet and ankles that I've been having when I've been exercising.I didn't go to my general practitioner for a yearly physical or any other problem. I went to a podiatrist for a specific problem. Did I get any help with that? Nope. I got a lecture on how I need to lose weight. How do I do that when every time I hit the treadmill or go for a walk my feet, ankles and shins hurt? Did you ask what I've been doing, if I'm working on losing weight? How about a suggestion for alternative forms of exercise? (Yes, I know the answer, and I've been doing it. Did you know that?) What about an answer to my question of how do I exercise to lose the weight you said I need to lose if I can't go for a simple walk on the treadmill without pain? And no, the "I know, it's a viscous cycle" answer that you gave really wasn't helpful. In fact, it just cemented the thought I had that you took one look at me, saw my weight, jumped to your conclusion and then went through the motions of the exam.

Rather like that other doctor I had 2 years ago when I was diagnosed with Low-T. He saw an obese person and didn't even bother with anything else. That is, until he saw the blood test he had me do just to appease me. Then he realized that there was something else wrong and called me back.

To any and all medical professionals reading this: Please, please go beyond the weight. There's a real person beneath those extra layers, sometimes with real problems. Where's your compassion?? Why did you become a doctor if you're really not interested in helping me and my problem?? (And for the small percentage of you that actually do care, thank you for making us feel like a person. Alysa, you're one of them. Thank you.)

And that's just the medical profession.

I walked in to a 2nd-hand exercise equipment place (yes, that was a hint) a few days ago to inquire on an accessory for my wife. They didn't have what I was looking for. But then when I stopped to ask about a stationary bike that caught my eye, the look and response I got made me feel as if they wondered why I even asked. As if my weight meant I don't exercise. Look. I'll admit I haven't exercised much in the last...15?...years, but I'm changing that. I've been exercising for about 2 months now, I'm loving it, and I'm looking to branch out and do more than just my 3 times a week in the pool. I would like to have a piece of equipment to do that. Obviously it won't be with a piece of equipment from that store. I wouldn't waste my money there. If you prefer to have an empty store to a person inquiring about the goods you sell, if you can gauge my interest in a piece of equipment just on my looks, my size, then I guess that's your business. I happen to think you're wrong, but it's still your business.

The worst about all this? I had been feeling wonderful. I had been on a couple-weeks' high from all the activity I'd been getting, from all the accomplishments I'd achieved by breaking previous exercise highs, both in time and distance. I had been feeling strong.

Two examples proved to me that I've got a long ways to go before I become "desirable". (And even when I shed all this weight...that's right, I said w-h-e-n...I'll still be undesirable because of this darn bald spot! But I'm at peace with that, so we're good.)

Frustration

As you can tell by the title of this post, this is going to be a rambling, complaining type of post today.

I am frustrated.

Why? I'm frustrated for many reasons. Let's take a look-see, shall we?

1. I haven't posted to this blog as often as I'd like to. I get good topic ideas but forget to write them down. So then when I DO have time to write, I don't really have a subject. That's gonna change. I'm gonna write down post ideas on my Android now. That should help.
2. I've been doing this healthy lifestyle thing for a while now, and I'm seeing little results. Well, on the scale, that is. My clothes feel looser, so that should be a good sign to me that what I'm doing is working. But I still want to see those damn numbers on that damn thing I step on every week to go down. Why won't the numbers budge??!? Especially if my clothes are feeling better?
3. I've been focusing on cutting back on my calorie intake and eating a lot more fruits and vegetables, eating different colors, getting whole grains in, eating more fish, etc. But the other day I was just SICK of veggies. I think, though, that I was just sick of broccoli and cauliflower. That has been our standard, our go-to veggie staple when we're in a hurry or can't come up with anything else. I've kind of gotten over that hump now, since I've had some just awesome roasted broccoli/cauliflower the past 2 days. But they included brussels sprouts and asparagus, too. So maybe the change has helped. The other thing is I just wanted to tear into a burger the other day. Not a healthy thing. But I also realized that denying myself the burger was a pretty unhealthy idea, too. Too bad I didn't have that thought before I ordered my meal. Oh well, it's a journey.
4. The past couple of times I've hit the pool it's felt like I've been swimming through Jell-O. What was once pretty easy to accomplish has just taken forever, with my muscles seeming to not want to cooperate with me and my lap speed taking a hit. It appears I've hit a proverbial wall with an exercise program. The trouble is, I don't really know what to do now. Do I take a break from the pool and do some cardio this week instead? Do I push through the soreness, stiffness and the burning muscles when I try to swim? Which is better? Which will help me get my lap times back up? I don't know.
5. UConn beat Butler. I was pulling for Butler. I'm not frustrated they lost. That was a very distinct possibility. I'm disappointed that they couldn't shoot for *@#%!!! I mean, c'mon! How can you expect to win when you shoot 12-64 on the floor??!? I understand that teams have bad nights, but the championship game is NOT the place to all of a sudden go cold with your shooting! Sheesh! (BTW, congratulations to UConn. Even though I was cheering for Butler and I think they played like louts, you had an awesome tourney run and deserve the title, gents!)
6. Now we come to my Twinkies....(That's the Minnesota Twins, for those of you not familiar with the endearing term for our beloved team). I don't know where to begin! I am certainly not a bandwagon fan, nor am I one who believes a baseball season is a sprint instead of a marathon, but...SERIOUSLY??!? Pitching was going to be questionable, but it's downright abysmal! And our batting? Ugh. Last night it was mentioned, before the game, I believe, that through the first 3 games the Yankees already had 11 home runs while the Twins only had 3 (THREE!) extra base hits!! Ouch! Seriously, Twins fans, there is no need to panic, yet. But this team HAS to settle down, or I'm going to be needing a case of Maalox a week before the All-Star break. Oh, and our high-priced, above-average hotshot middle infielder from Japan we just picked up? He already has 2 errors! I truly hope it's just nerves from playing over here in the US, but it's still the same game.

Okay. I think I'm done ranting now. Thanks for letting me vent.

Modeling

What? Me?? A model??!?

It's true. Recent research, that others have thankfully done and explained in terms that a layman like me can understand, has shown that kids pick up on what their parents do, effectively making parents role models for their children.

Now, I knew I was a role model before all this came out. But I didn't know the extent to how much. I thought it was just for things such as manners, social norms, that kind of thing. But now it seems my little ones are looking at me to much more than just social mores.

And it makes sense, too. I look back on my childhood and how my parents behaved. A little background is in order.

My mom and dad were VERY thin and in shape in high school. As the challenges of full-time jobs and having a family increased, their participation in physical activities decreased. Growing up, I remember my parents in various co-ed volleyball and softball activities. But those activities trailed off as I got to junior high. I am the oldest in my family, so the more involved in things my brothers and I got, the more it makes sense that they had less time for those activities. Which kind of brings me to my point. I never saw my parents exercise or do anything outside of those structured activities for their fitness. There were no real bike rides, no treadmills, no elliptical machines, no trips to the local YMCA or any other health clubs. Fitness was not a priority for them.

And it is reflected in me today.

Not only physical fitness, but nutrition was modeled for me as well. My mom was the main driver of our diet (noun, not verb). When she was on Weight Watchers, we all ate that style of meals. When she did the Pritikin diet, we did it, too. We were always eating the next big fad of a diet. Low-fat turned to low-carb, we did it all . I grew up knowing what it meant to count points, even though I didn't need to count points or attend meetings myself at that age. I was healthy and a normal young man, but I felt like I was overweight. Thinness was an obsession, one that was never obtained.

Now, it may seem that I'm blaming my parents for my sedentary lifestyle and current predicament. I'm not. Well, I'm not trying to, at least. Family was important to them, and they spent a lot of time with us boys playing catch and taking us to our various sporting activities. They put our needs first. But they never took care of themselves. Not in the physical fitness arena, that is. I never saw that fitness and health should be a priority in my life.

So it dawned on me as I struggle to get my fitness in, that I shouldn't feel guilty for hitting the treadmill. I want to be a great father. I want to be a dad that my girls adore and feel would give or do anything for them. I want to spend time with them and play with them. But I need to be around in order for that to happen. I need to take care of myself first, in that regard, so I can do all that other stuff.

My girls need to see that fitness and good nutrition is important in daily life. I don't want them to have to struggle to get started the way I have. It's taken me a lot just to get eating right and to get myself to the YMCA 3 days a week, and to hit the treadmill one or two more times that week. It's taken me a lot to love the taste of real food over the overly-processed, highly refined crap that my body doesn't want or need. I don't want them to have to overcome that kind of lazy inertia that I had going. I don't want them to be worrying if they can keep this healthy lifestyle up once they get a good routine going.

I don't need to do this for myself. I need to do it for them.

Because I am a model.

Sweat

So, it appears that I don't do this blog thing correctly. I don't keep a set schedule, I don't have a central blog topic and I ramble. I figure that's okay, though, because this is for me and my journey, really. I'm putting my thoughts and feelings out there, mostly for my benefit.

My wife and I were talking earlier this week and it dawned on us that we really love to work out! We have been exercising on a regular basis for a little over a month now, and we got to talking about how we had both forgotten how awesome it feels to sweat. Obviously not in certain situations, like sitting at your desk at work or giving a speech or sleeping or whatever, but that sweat that you get when you really bust your butt in your exercise of choice. The type of sweat that brings all the endorphins flowing.

It's been a long time since I've exercised in any kind of structure. About two months ago I decided I needed to start again. I'm overweight, out of shape, tired and I just generally felt lousy. My favorite exercise to do, aside from team sports, has been lap swimming. Not only do I love getting in the water, but I love the fact that it doesn't kill my joints. I can get a good sweat and not feel overheated, at least until after I exit the pool.

This past week I found a really awesome routine to do in the pool. Before, I used to just jump in and go through my strokes x2. With warm-up, cool-down and a kickboard lap, that made 11 total laps. It took me about 25 minutes. But I always wanted to do just freestyle (front crawl) the entire time, since I figured that would be the best cardio workout. Well, I found a great routine for beginner triathletes (I'm not going there....yet.). But it's only for 8 laps. I tried it the first time on Monday, and it was really tough. It wasn't so much that it was hard on the lungs, but my arms were just spent by time it was over.

I loved it.

I loved it so much I did it again on Wednesday. Friday was a modified version of that. When I finish this routine, I can't believe how strong I feel. It makes me feel so strong that I don't feel like I got any kind of cardio workout. I also finish it in less time. I feel even if were to do the other 3 laps I'd still finish in less time. That's an awesome feeling.

It makes me feel, well, powerful. I makes me feel like I can take on the world. It makes me feel....healthy.

I want more.

Trepidation

About a month ago I joined the local YMCA here to help me lose weight. It was a bonus that my company picks up half the monthly tab. But I really wanted to start swimming to get back into better health.

I'm a fairly large guy -- I think the doctors call it morbidly obese. Reading that definition of you in a doctor's referral letter to a specialist kind of makes you take note, but that's a different post. But, being a large guy, I am also terribly out of shape.

Strike one.

As I was saying, I'm a large guy. Some types of workouts cause me more pain than others. I also have a pain in the front of my shins that I always thought was just shin splints, but after seeing a podiatrist about it he called it something else. It's gotten less, but it's still hard to walk too fast, or even too far. I've got special orthotics to help me deal with it. But in my mind the problem is my legs are too big and it's forced me to change my gait.

Strike two.

Did I mention I'm asthmatic, too?

Strike three?

Not so fast there, cowboy. I may be asthmatic, but I can still exercise. I've worked with an allergist and gotten that part under control. So that's no excuse to not at least go for a walk, hit the treadmill, the elliptical or even a leisurely bike ride. I can do those things, slowly, not because of my asthma, but because I'm out of shape. I need to get back into shape. But how?

Enter swimming.

Swimming is an exercise that I LOVE to do. I am not going to break any Olympic records, but I know the strokes (except for the butterfly. That one's always eluded me!). But I can do the front and back crawls, I can sidestroke, I can breaststroke. So, I got the Y membership with the thought that I would swim a few laps over my lunch break.

I've gone for 3 weeks, now, 3 times a week. And I don't really look forward to going. Not because of the laps, themselves. No. I hate going because I fear sharing a lane.

There are only 4 lanes in the good swimming pool. The other one is more of a recreation, play pool. I hate, hate, HATE not knowing if there will be an open lane when I go. I've tried to tweak the times I go, trying to find the time the pool is the most open. Most of the time I'm lucky and get a lane to myself. I wasn't so luck on Monday. Last weekend must have been a really bad weekend for some people, because all the lanes were doubled up that day. So there must've been some serious partying going on over the weekend, with food and wine flowing non-stop.

Once I get in the pool, I'm just fine. But I dread it from the time I get in my car until the time I am actually in the pool to see how many lanes are open. I hate that feeling. It's hard enough for me to get to the gym, walking in looking the way I do. I feel everyone's eyes are on me, wondering why I'm going to the gym. It's OBVIOUS I don't spend much time in workout facilities, at least I haven't in the past. But I don't just walk in, I go into an area with a lot of bare skin showing. There's not much hiding I can do in the pool, or walking to the pool. It feels like a walk of shame. Each step in nothing but my swim trunks is a stark reminder of how far I have let myself go, how far I have left to go.

There are products out there, personal swim pools that create a current you can swim against. I would love to get one of those. I could swim laps in the privacy of my own home, get fit and in shape without anyone seeing the process. But it's not practical. Those things are upwards of $20k, and then I'd need to have an indoor shed built for it, too, since I live in the frozen tundra of the upper Midwest. That would add even more to the cost, money that we just don't have, money that should be spent more wisely than that.

Swimming is good for me. It's easy on my joints, builds aerobic capacity and strength at the same time, and I enjoy doing it. So, each M-W-F, I will suffer the trepidation of having to share a pool lane. It will make me a stronger person in the long run.

Rewrite

I had a friend point out to me the other day that I haven't been doing my due diligence on the whole blog thing.

She's right.

I suck at this. Mostly because I could really turn this into a rambling affair rather quickly. Well, that and the fact that I really don't want to write posts at work. Then, when I'm home, it's supper, play with the chillin's for a few hours, clean up a little, then bed. I guess I manage a little TV in there somewhere, too. I suppose I could use the time in front of the TV to knock out a post or two, but I've never been one to multitask like that. That would cause even more rambling! Hard to get followers like that.

The other thing that's a little annoying to me is the title of the blog. Cayenne and Coffee?? Seriously??!? What was I thinking?? I mean, I like spicy foods, I like coffee. But between the first post and this last one, I've kind of slowed down on the whole cayenne IN my coffee. I really like the Spicy Mocha from Caribou Coffee still, as well as the Mayan Sun from the local place, but I don't make a habit of putting cayenne in my coffee. First off, I noticed that it floats and doesn't get mixed in very well. I've heard about putting it in with the grounds, and that would work, but then my wife would have spicy coffee, too, and I don't think she'd appreciate that all too much.

I was turned to a great blog that seems right up my alley the other day from a Twitter friend. I kind of want to pattern this blog after that, too. But I don't want to (completely) copy someone else's idea. I did enough of that in college. (KIDDING!)

So, I'm going to try to get back into posting. I'm not sure how it will all turn out, I just promise that I'll put more effort into it. There may be changes as I get my feet wet and try new things, so please bear with me as I get it all sorted out.